Either I hit the nail on the head with my assertion, am way off base or no one really cares about what's going on in our Urban community.
I think understanding this fear of failure at being the environmentally defined man is key for us as Christians to understand as we trek through the ideas of Urban fear, and urban living. If you look at the core of many urban issues: poverty, drugs, sex, gangs, violence, welfare, abortions and so on the root is a failing system of manhood. Many would disagree with me, but I feel as though the weight of urban issues goes on the shoulders of urban men (as well as Suburban men) not being the true defined man, but settling for a less than system of masculinity that appears to be "stronger" but has ended up fracturing society. These men desperately desire to be considered a man, but they reach fast and strong at the environmentally defined man.
Urban women have been the glue that has kept it all from crumbling completely, but as society changes and women in urban societies feel more empowered, they may just stop trying to pick up the pieces because they just don't want to have to do it any more...because they were not designed to be that person.
In order to stem the tide of the issues that cause fear, we must attack the root, which in my heart of hearts is a failing definition of manhood many of our urban societies adhere to. Reading through the book of Nehemiah nearly a year ago I heard God say to my heart: "In order to rebuild this city (Pittsburgh), the men must be rebuilt first", I press into that as often as I remember it, asking God what that means, what that may look like but have not received anything else but that word.
This is not a sexist blog by any means, it's a plea to appeal to the hearts of many to see the rising wave of failing manhood around us. I always try to speak into the urban youth I bump into about manhood, sharing with them that the environmentally defined manhood is weak, superficial and short-lasting, but God's definition of manhood is deep, rich and has everlasting ramifications.
Here is this weeks conclusion on Urban Fear, much of it is based on a failing definition of manhood, which in turn creates men that are broken, torn, violent, greedy, sexually promiscuous, and walking through life fighting for purpose and meaning. This type of man hurts the women in his life, causes fear for the children and eventually breaks neighborhoods down into dangerous, unwatched and violent hubs of life.
Boys and girls that grow up in this environment seek to emulate what they've seen because their is some cultural glorification in the defined man and so the girls seek to find that man and the boys seek to be that man and the cycle continues.
This may seem overwhelming and to be sure it is. However, there are things we can do to help model and live out something different. What are your thoughts on redeeming the men of this city?
*After much consideration, I will now rename this thread Urban Life*
The church has wrestled, fought, argued and gotten a bit scrappy on this issue.
The world around us has fought back with similar vigor.
I'm not into culture wars, so I mean no flare ups from either camp (although I may incur some), I simply feel the desire to shed some light in areas that we seem to be missing.
1. Homosexuality is NOT the main issue facing the church
Sadly both the liberal Christians and the Conservative Christians have made this single issue "the issue". Many have focused their entire lives on either side of the issue, reading Scripture through a "for" or "against" stance. Both sides do this with a sense of "Fighting Satan" or "Fighting Hate" but at this point, those war cries are bogus, maybe they always were bogus. Many would say that fighting against this issue may offend some, but the Gospel is offensive, my answer is if your Gospel is only anti-gay you're missing a huge piece of the Gospel...Jesus. The Cross is what's offensive. His death, for our sins, which includes his dying for the sin of homosexuality, other sexual sins and the sins of the people holding the signs, declaring a "Gospel war". Jesus is the main issue facing the church and He always has been.
"This Jesus is the stone that was rejected by you, the builders, which has become the cornerstone" (Acts 4:11 ESV)
By making Homosexuality the issue, both camps lose focus on Jesus and the cross. The Holy Spirit within us calls us to live the Story of Jesus in this world, and He gives us the power to do so. Jesus isn't always a nice happy clappy guy, but he does love deeply. Jesus called people out on their sins, but he did so in love. The woman caught in adultery, the same sin of sexual immorality, was first protected by Jesus, then he lovingly said: "Now leave this life of sin". The implication was that he could offer something better than the sins she allowed to rule her life. Does God have something better for homosexuals? Yes. Does he have something better for us? Yes.
The fog has been created by the enemy in order for us to take our eyes off the real issue: Jesus. Sadly, we are more focused on will their be Gay marriage than is Jesus being preached. We're more willing to put a self proclaimed cult leader (Mormonism is a cult) then ever before, because of this single issue.
Not saying one candidate is better than the other, just saying we are allowing the enemy to FOG us to death and He's winning the battle by taking our eyes of the main thing.
2. My Generation is Leaving the church because of this issue
Many young people in my generation are using this issue to hang their "I'm done with church" hat on, the fog of this issue has clouded their minds as well as the generations above. Let me first talk to my generation. Guys, this is not the issue to hang it up on. Don't pack it all in, don't sell out. Maybe God is speaking to many of you about this issue and I truly believe he's calling us to be middle ground people, not far right or far left on this issue. The Bible is clear on many things and sexual immorality is one of them. Our generation has struggled with sexual temptation more so than any others. The availability of porn, the free open sex relationships, friends with benefits all of these issues have clouded our thinking on sexual conduct and the enemy has won some ground on how we think about sex, giving us over to thinking these things are OK but they are NOT. We need to re-learn the Bible and re-learn true sexual intimacy. If God is calling you to help make a change in the church...leaving won't help. We may get frustrated, we may get down but if the Spirit is truly leading us, then He in us will make headway, He will turn His people back to himself and He may call us to help make the change. Don't run like so many in our generation do, stay the course and be used to make the change, not just blog and complain about it.
Older generations: don't allow one particular sin blind you from the rest. Don't allow my generations voice to turn you completely away from us. When a young person speaks and you completely dismiss everything, you cause more pain than you know and in so doing you prove my generation right about how they see/think about you. I know you care. I know you love, don't be so quick to dismiss us or call us heretics as many have done. There are a good number of us who hold to the Scriptures, who Love Jesus and who are filled with the Spirit. It will be on us who hold to Jesus and to course correct our generation because sadly, when you're gone we will need to hold the fort. Please pour into us, pour in with love, passion and Jesus. Pour the word over us, not by bashing it into us but by lovingly talking it out. Don't push us away, I beg you. I won't, leave because God has called me to be a bridge but many of my generation will keep leaving if our voice is completely ignored. Debate with us, help us see when and where we're wrong but don't dismiss us.
This issue is a FOG folks, let's all look to Jesus, let's pray to Him, let's allow His Spirit to permeate all we say and do. I think then we'll see this issue isn't the giant we need to slay, but simply a fog blocking the real enemy from view.
I stated my desire to see how YOU would answer these questions, so for Day 2, I've put two questions here...one off the wall and the other pretty serious.
If a young person came to you and asked: Is God Wrinkly How would you respond?
If a young person asked you: How do I share my faith in School How would you answer?
It's important to get some answers here, so think: how would I answer these questions? Then comment it!
I stated my desire to see how YOU would answer these questions, so for Day 1, I've put two questions here...one off the wall and the other pretty serious.
If a young person came to you and asked: Is the Church my Mother? How would you respond?
If a young person asked you: Where did Evolution come from? How would you answer?
DISCUSS!
I fear too often the church ignores the questions of young people and this lack of answering causes several to walk away and seek their answers elsewhere.
Steve Jobs was such a person.
Recently I read an article by Gordon MacDonald in Leadership Journal entitled The Soul of Steve Jobs, where he asks the question: "What would it have taken to reach the Apple Founder's core?"
He goes on to describe a scene mentioned in the highly acclaimed book on the life of Steve Jobs by Walter Isaacson (titled Steve Jobs) where a 13 year old Steve asks his pastor at the time a question. Here's the snippet:
"In July 1968 Life magazine published a shocking cover showing a pair of starving children in Biafara. Jobs took it to Sunday school and confronted the church's pastor, 'If I raise my finger, will God know which one I'm going to raise before I do it?'
"The Pastor answers, 'Yes, God knows everything'.
"Jobs then pulled out the Life cover and asked, 'Well, does God know about this and what's going to happen to those children?'
"Steve, I know you don't understand, but yes, God knows about that.'"
According to Isaacson, Jobs left church and never darkened another door. George MacDonald goes on to say in his article: "For the pastor, that brief exchange was likely incidental and forgettable. Yet, it was a turning point that would point Steve Jobs towards eastern philosophy."
I, by my answers and reactions to questions that young people pose to me, have the power of turning people towards God, or away from God. This realization only encouraged me more in the You've Got Questions series because I realized for a long while I just kept teaching these young people what I thought they needed to hear...not what they thought they needed to hear.
It's as if much of Youth Ministry and Ministry to Young Adults has become an airplane safety check, when these young people are in cars and could care less about airplane safety at the moment.
I realized from doing these series that I was not tapping the nerve that needed tapped, but rather smacking things around that weren't necessary to smack.
Ever feel like you're not speaking to your audience? Yeah, I've been there and in a lot of ways...we're probably NOT speaking to them.
I felt so compelled with the series that I've decided to write a book about the answers I've researched and come up with...BUT I desire you're input too! I will be posting random questions here on the blog and seeking good, Godly answers to them and I will definitely put the best into the book, with the proper credit.
This generation desires to be heard and answered. They are willing to sit and listen to the answers to their questions...and ask more along the way! Tomorrow, I will post the first question!
I'm pretty sure the last one isn't true, because I do care what goes on, and who goes into the oval office, I think I've been laying low because of the hype certain people were getting...then lost. The game before now really doesn't mean much at all, it's just words, money spent, campaigns launched and campaigns crashed. The TV is replete with bashing words against the other candidate, tabloids are chock full of what the daughters, wives, sons, grandmas and grandpas of each candidate to be were doing last week and why those stories will effect for good or ill the outcome of the candidate.
Now, we get to the real deal, right, now we have two strong candidates? It's all going to be policy, personality, best political understanding and what's truly best for the American people right? Sadly no.
Christians are all up in a tizzy about the religious states of both candidates. Romney: Mormon; Obama: Christian claiming with Islamic family past. Some say we need Obama because who needs a Mormon. Others say a Mormon is better than a no good Democrat who's dug us into deep holes.
Non-Christians and Christians a like vote stronger on their political affiliation than anything else but Non-Christians don't always try to use religion in their decision, just who is on "their side" of issues.
I'm not here advocating for either candidate because as I stated earlier I'm pretty ignorant of what the main "issues" are, as I educate myself on the candidates, I will later weigh in. I think I may just vote Ross Perot (don't worry, I know he's not running) because he has a lot of money and has never gotten his shot...kind of like the political Trix bunny, everyone just tells him: "Poor Ross, the President seat is just for real politicians".
These are just a few of my dribbles on politics 2012. Feel free to weigh in your thoughts and ideas...I just hate the games, can I get an AMEN?
In an urban diverse community, such as the church I am in, these issues shouldn't go unpacked. Not saying they haven't been mentioned or worked on, but in the blogosphere not much has been talked through, worked on and exposed.
Some of the feedback I was given was to be more specific in my search for urban fears, but I feel keeping it ambiguous gives a sense of freedom for folks to air there fears. We all come from different backgrounds and perspectives, so we will have different fears. This week, I will share my neighbors answer to this question.
This past week, my elderly neighbor Ulysses came over to tell me his wife had passed. He shared with me his love for his bride as if he had just gotten hitched days earlier. He shared his love for Jesus and how He was His hope.
Shortly after he came over, we got to talking about our neighborhood. I asked him about the old crack house that was directly next to his house. This house was used for wheeling and dealing until it was shut down, renovated and is now back on the market.
I asked Ulysses: "How did it get that way? What caused the owners to go down that path?" Ulysses shared with me some deep, personal and eye opening things. His answer was from his perspective, as an older Black man, living in Pittsburgh for years.
He said: "The jobs got scarce. Money was tight and so the man sought to find a way to take care of his family." He said this matter of factly, as if it didn't bother him as much as I thought it might. I asked him: "What would drive him that far that he would deal drugs?" He said something I won't forget. He said: "To a black man growing up in my neighborhood, taking care of yourself and your family was making sure you all had food, shelter and clothes. If a man didn't take care of his family, he failed. This man, as so many like him are afraid of failing as men so they will do anything sometimes in order to not fail."
This answer blew me away. Now remember, this is one older gentleman's perspective; I'm not saying he's right or he's wrong. This blew me away because in his scenario, it was the man's honor and FEAR of failure that drove him to illegal distribution of drugs.
I have seen, sensed and experienced this drive for "manhood". Too many of the urban teens (black, white, latino, you name it) I come across, being a man and succeeding in that means: "money, girls and respect" and these young men will do ANYTHING in order to achieve what they consider to be a "successful man". The fear of failure at being a "man" strikes such a strong chord with many of them overlook the illegal to achieve the temporal success of being a man.
Growing up in the inner-city, I myself felt supreme pressure to conform to the idea of manhood my neighborhood defined for me. Sex, money, sports were all touted as supreme goals to achieve in order to be considered manly. God, through my father, church and home environment shielded me from conforming to and being subjected to higher levels of exposure, but the pressures were still there.
Our urban young men are striving to be good men and are desperately afraid of failing.
Agree? Disagree? Additions? LET'S DISCUSS!
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